About shaving

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Dear Sex Counselor,

I am noticing more and more women that I see in my medical practice have completely shaved off all of their pubic hair. I find this very arousing and interesting. However, I have never been brave enough to ask why women shave. I have dropped some hints to my wife but she does not seem interested. She is very concerned about subsequent itching, discomfort, and the need for daily shaves. Why do so many now shave, especially in the 20-35 age group? Is this something that women find exciting, or are they doing it for their mates? Any suggestions on how I could get my wife to try this thing that is such a turn-on for me?


I can’t personally speak to why women (and men) are shaving their pubic hair, so I’ll extend an invitation to our visitors to share with us, via e-mail, why they shave and what they like about it. I’ll post some of the responses to this message so you can hear it directly from them.

We have heard from those who shave who say that they do have to shave daily to avoid itching and discomfort, and that shaving does increase the sensitivity of their skin at times. So your wife’s concerns are valid. I have some suggestions for you to try, to see if she’d be willing to meet you in this fantasy. Ultimately, of course, it is her body, and she may just not want to shave her pubic hair.

One suggestion I have is to invite her to a mutual shaving session, where you shave her and she shaves you. Get some lush shaving lotion that’s specifically meant for genital shaving and make it a part of a romantic, sexy date. The mutual aspect of it may appeal to her, and she may also find that she likes your smooth pubic region. Some women tell us that they really like testicles without hair.

The other suggestion I have is to see if she’d be willing to shave partially rather than completely. Maybe start by just a trim around the "bikini line" and progress from there. Let her know that it is one of the things that really arouses you, and you’d love it if she’d consider doing it when she wants to do something extra sexy for you.

And finally, you may have to just keep it as a fantasy. Most recent adult videos feature women who shave, so you could enjoy the visual stimulation by renting a movie. Work to find ways to get the arousal without having your wife shave if she just doesn’t want to. And if she shaves, then doesn’t like the experience, be supportive of her, offer to rub some soothing lotion into the area, and give her some strokes for trying it.

Here’s one note I’ve received on the topic of shaving. Feel free to send others!

I’ve shaved my pubic hair for about three years. I started because my then boyfriend asked me to - he thought it was sexy. I thought so too, so I tried it, with his help and an electric razor. It was one of the most erotic experiences of my life, and when we were done, I was more comfortable than ever since puberty. Personally, I find pubic hair more annoying than anything else, and even having to constantly shave is better than having the hair, for me. Also, I really like oral sex, and the boyfriend (who is now my husband) likes it better without all that scratchy hair in his mouth.

The Sex Counselor